The feeling of being so incredibly close to your goal yet having it continue to stay just beyond your reach is such a painful/comforting reminder that we aren't in control. I have to confess that after getting the news that I only lost 0.8lbs this week my instant reaction was anger - directed toward God. I know it's a bold statement but it's honest. I was angry with him. I can't fully explain why....I was being a bratty punk.
Currently sitting at Panera Bread. When my food arrived at my table I sat before it for a few moments in total mental silence. I couldn't eat it yet my stomach was growling and my heart was aching for comfort, encouragement and repentence. I couldn't even eat without asking for forgiveness. The pride that so quickly wells up in my heart was subsided the instant I bowed my head in submission.
I can't run this race without Him. When I am weak He has promised to be strong. It's been a hard week in more ways that just weight loss.
Here's a text sent early this morning by my close friend/brutal accountability partner, Dane.
Hey friend! I just needed to tell you something this morning- even if by some chance you don't meet your goal weight today it's OKAY! God is still on His throne and LOVES YOU very much and it will still happen! So remember that today. Love ya
How could she have known? What would've motivated her to write such a text?
We all know the answer to that question....
All is well. As hard as it seems right now I know I won't quit. Thanks for stopping by today.