I think I'm finally in the clear. Stomach issues are somewhat under control now. I've only been in the gym twice this week, both of which were for cardio. Tonight we work on muscles. I'll let you know how that goes...
On another note: spiritual muscles feel sprained! God's been bringing to light some pretty serious heart issues such as idolatry, jealousy, and "other" things. I'll ellaborate when it becomes more clear. Until then let us continue to press on.
2Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Stomach Bug
Yesterday morning I woke up feeling kinda "off". Met Sir Chadwick at the gym and completed a semi normal cardio routine. I jokingly call him Merciless Mike when he's being hardcore but yesterday he was pure mercy and even let me off the hook with a semi medium easy routine. I'm thankful too cause I was feeling pretty crappy. I left the gym, headed to the office and found myself almost gagging through my breakfast (cottage cheese and peaches). I ended up leaving the office around 9:30am and heading home. I felt like I was going to be really sick there and decided to save face and hurl at home. Anyhow, I was sick for the rest of the day.
Oh, and when I got home I noticed that my sister's car was still in driveway. She too was sick. I wonder if we ate something or just caught a little bug. I dunno, and I don't care...I just want to get to feeling better already.
Thank you to all my girls for their well wishes. And, thanks Dane for bringing me soup and a bread bowl last night that was soooooooooooooooo super sweet. I probably had a total of 4 bites and I wish I could say it was delicious but you know how food and stomach issues go....
Oh, and my friend Diane said that she'd be more than happy to come by and drop off a can of soup at my door step. That made me laugh. Thanks, D!!
It's day 2 and I'm home. I feel guilty for being home and yet I can't seem to muster the energy to stay awake.
One more thing. Sir Chadwick has given me homework. My assignment - post two pictures. One picture has to be preworking out and the other has to be a recent picture. February 3rd marks our 6 months anniversary!!! (I love that exclamation pionts make one look so excited - if you could only see my face and engery level you'd laugh your head off) So, Stayed tuned for that post!
Oh, and when I got home I noticed that my sister's car was still in driveway. She too was sick. I wonder if we ate something or just caught a little bug. I dunno, and I don't care...I just want to get to feeling better already.
Thank you to all my girls for their well wishes. And, thanks Dane for bringing me soup and a bread bowl last night that was soooooooooooooooo super sweet. I probably had a total of 4 bites and I wish I could say it was delicious but you know how food and stomach issues go....
Oh, and my friend Diane said that she'd be more than happy to come by and drop off a can of soup at my door step. That made me laugh. Thanks, D!!
It's day 2 and I'm home. I feel guilty for being home and yet I can't seem to muster the energy to stay awake.
One more thing. Sir Chadwick has given me homework. My assignment - post two pictures. One picture has to be preworking out and the other has to be a recent picture. February 3rd marks our 6 months anniversary!!! (I love that exclamation pionts make one look so excited - if you could only see my face and engery level you'd laugh your head off) So, Stayed tuned for that post!
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Weight Loss Update
Starting Weight: 372 lbs
Current Weight: 319.4 lbs
Last Weigh In: -1.8 lbs
Total Weight Loss: 52.6 lbs
Current Weight: 319.4 lbs
Last Weigh In: -1.8 lbs
Total Weight Loss: 52.6 lbs
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Tag. I'm it!
My friend, Bianca, tagged me on this little deal. So, here are my answers.
1. Name one thing you do every day.
Aside from pray. I lather myself with an essential bit of Bath & Body Works cream. I love that each day I get to use a new flavor…it’s such a nice way to start my routine. I love it! I’ll share my kidney but don’t ask me to share my Bath & Body. LOL
2. Name two things you wish you could learn.
French.
I wish I’d learn to love the Lord with all my heart, mind and soul. I’m tired of being a 30% lover of Christ. I WANT MORE!! I desire to desire Him.
3. Name three things that remind you of your childhood.
Swimming Pools. I immediately think of the sounds of splashing water, people laughing, blowing bubbles under water, dunking, and back floating in the middle of pool with one around but God. Good times.
Watermelon! Nothing like a cool piece of watermelon on a blistering Corpus Christi Day!
The Beach. I love the smell of salty air.
4. Name four things you love to eat but rarely do.
FRUIT CUPS!!! It’s a South Texas thing. This cup is loaded with all kinds of goodness. Fruit cups are layered as follows: (bottom to top) watermelon, cantaloupe, honey dew, pineapple (extra pineapple for me please!), cucumbers, and coconut. Then, there’s this yummy salty/spicy/lime concoction added over the top of the fruit and it drips down onto each layer to create this incredible almost indescribable GREATNESS! My mouth is literally watering as I write this!
My daddy’s BBQ! That’s all I gotta say about that!! I love my dad. I love his BBQ more! LOL jk DAD!
My mom’s lentijas! It’s like a Mexican version to the American Chili only made with lentils and has way more meat!
The Mediterranean Kitchen! My favorite dining experience in the whole wide world!! It’s located in Bellevue, WA (my old stomping ground) and I miss it dearly!
5. Name five things or people that make you feel good.
Holding a puppy. I just love their sweet soft fur. Not to mention that I LOVE LOVE LOVE puppy breath. I don’t know why…God made me weird like that!
My sister. When I stop and think about it, I mean really think about it, God could’ve put us in two different families but he chose to put us together! She knows my heart. She makes me laugh like no other on this planet and she gets me. I moved back from Seattle because I just couldn’t imagine raising a family without her.
*just a quick snap shot of us. This picture makes me laugh so hard!
Genuine Friends. I often feel the closest to the Lord when I’m with my friends in the middle of a laughing fit, tear running down my face, and completely unable to breath. I know that many people come into our lives for a reason and sometimes for only a season but regardless of their purpose I love them.
Waterbabies!!!! Not many of you know this but my true passion is aquatics. Not just any type of aquatics but infant aquatics! Here are a few pictures from a few classes I taught in Seattle. I hope one day God will allow me to start my very own swim school. I enjoyed teaching the itty babies and after much coaxing by the aquatic director I teaching the advanced group of kids (baby grads – 1st class session for the child without the parent in the water) and I later learned that they stole my heart. I just loved teaching them the most basic principles of water and when they learned to trust me they’d do just about anything I asked. God taught me so much with these children. I pray that as an adult that I’d be more like some of the babies I was able to swim along with – fearless, no hesitations, trusting and eager to play and learn.
The last answer goes without saying….. I love that our Lord is ever faithful. Why would He willingly choose us?!
Tag five people. You’re it!
Peggy
Uyen
Kendra
Tracey
Kimbeau
Emily
1. Name one thing you do every day.
Aside from pray. I lather myself with an essential bit of Bath & Body Works cream. I love that each day I get to use a new flavor…it’s such a nice way to start my routine. I love it! I’ll share my kidney but don’t ask me to share my Bath & Body. LOL
2. Name two things you wish you could learn.
French.
I wish I’d learn to love the Lord with all my heart, mind and soul. I’m tired of being a 30% lover of Christ. I WANT MORE!! I desire to desire Him.
3. Name three things that remind you of your childhood.
Swimming Pools. I immediately think of the sounds of splashing water, people laughing, blowing bubbles under water, dunking, and back floating in the middle of pool with one around but God. Good times.
Watermelon! Nothing like a cool piece of watermelon on a blistering Corpus Christi Day!
The Beach. I love the smell of salty air.
4. Name four things you love to eat but rarely do.
FRUIT CUPS!!! It’s a South Texas thing. This cup is loaded with all kinds of goodness. Fruit cups are layered as follows: (bottom to top) watermelon, cantaloupe, honey dew, pineapple (extra pineapple for me please!), cucumbers, and coconut. Then, there’s this yummy salty/spicy/lime concoction added over the top of the fruit and it drips down onto each layer to create this incredible almost indescribable GREATNESS! My mouth is literally watering as I write this!
My daddy’s BBQ! That’s all I gotta say about that!! I love my dad. I love his BBQ more! LOL jk DAD!
My mom’s lentijas! It’s like a Mexican version to the American Chili only made with lentils and has way more meat!
The Mediterranean Kitchen! My favorite dining experience in the whole wide world!! It’s located in Bellevue, WA (my old stomping ground) and I miss it dearly!
5. Name five things or people that make you feel good.
Holding a puppy. I just love their sweet soft fur. Not to mention that I LOVE LOVE LOVE puppy breath. I don’t know why…God made me weird like that!
My sister. When I stop and think about it, I mean really think about it, God could’ve put us in two different families but he chose to put us together! She knows my heart. She makes me laugh like no other on this planet and she gets me. I moved back from Seattle because I just couldn’t imagine raising a family without her.
*just a quick snap shot of us. This picture makes me laugh so hard!
Genuine Friends. I often feel the closest to the Lord when I’m with my friends in the middle of a laughing fit, tear running down my face, and completely unable to breath. I know that many people come into our lives for a reason and sometimes for only a season but regardless of their purpose I love them.
Waterbabies!!!! Not many of you know this but my true passion is aquatics. Not just any type of aquatics but infant aquatics! Here are a few pictures from a few classes I taught in Seattle. I hope one day God will allow me to start my very own swim school. I enjoyed teaching the itty babies and after much coaxing by the aquatic director I teaching the advanced group of kids (baby grads – 1st class session for the child without the parent in the water) and I later learned that they stole my heart. I just loved teaching them the most basic principles of water and when they learned to trust me they’d do just about anything I asked. God taught me so much with these children. I pray that as an adult that I’d be more like some of the babies I was able to swim along with – fearless, no hesitations, trusting and eager to play and learn.
The last answer goes without saying….. I love that our Lord is ever faithful. Why would He willingly choose us?!
Tag five people. You’re it!
Peggy
Uyen
Kendra
Tracey
Kimbeau
Emily
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Spoke to soon!
Our workout tonight was certainly NOT easy. I'm thinking that my earlier post was written prematurely. There was a brief moment where I thought Sir Chadwick must've read up on this blog and was now getting me back! I'm sad to report that he hadn't read the post - he just stepped up the routine for the fun of it! How nice of him...
Wanna hear something really sick about Sir Chadwick? The poor guy was totally exhausted when he arrived at the gym. I don't know how he keeps up with his schedule. Seriously, between classes, work, church, serving and additional clients I really felt bad that he was so tired and was still faithful to meet me after his work day. However!!! don't feel too bad because the instant sweat started to drip down my face the stinker seemed to be re-energized I'd even venture to say he was almost "perky" SICKNESS!!! totally sickness!
Here are a few pictures of some of his latest "upgrades"
These are deceivingly painful and I'm still doing the modified version (knees on the floor)
Another upgrade - He added dumbbells. Not delicious!
One would think that holding a ball over your head while squatting would be relatively simple, right?!
This particular exercise causes my thighs to shake uncontrollably. Not fun but so worth the results. He's also fond of adding dumbbells or medicine balls to this exercise. Anything to keep me on my toes, right?
Wanna hear something really sick about Sir Chadwick? The poor guy was totally exhausted when he arrived at the gym. I don't know how he keeps up with his schedule. Seriously, between classes, work, church, serving and additional clients I really felt bad that he was so tired and was still faithful to meet me after his work day. However!!! don't feel too bad because the instant sweat started to drip down my face the stinker seemed to be re-energized I'd even venture to say he was almost "perky" SICKNESS!!! totally sickness!
Here are a few pictures of some of his latest "upgrades"
These are deceivingly painful and I'm still doing the modified version (knees on the floor)
Another upgrade - He added dumbbells. Not delicious!
One would think that holding a ball over your head while squatting would be relatively simple, right?!
This particular exercise causes my thighs to shake uncontrollably. Not fun but so worth the results. He's also fond of adding dumbbells or medicine balls to this exercise. Anything to keep me on my toes, right?
Quick Update
Just a quick update. Eating well this week. Work outs are going well. I don't know if my body is getting accustomed to the routine or strain, if I'm getting stronger, or if Sir Chadwick is giving me a slight break butthe gym stuff has been less difficult this week. I'm not in any way saying it's been easy either!
This has helped soothe my heart.
Titus 3:4-7
This has helped soothe my heart.
But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us,not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.
Titus 3:4-7
Monday, January 21, 2008
Uncertain Night
It's almost 12am. I took a nap today before small group. I'm semi wired. Sitting here alone with my thoughts is not good for me. I don't have anything exciting to report but I felt like writing. Earlier today I found myself sitting in the parking lot of Mardel's Christian Book Store after just having ended a conversation with my accountilbilty partner. It's so funny how God has used her to speak truth into my life. Had her confronting and sharp words come from anyone else I'm positive my instant reaction would've resulted in verbal vomit....on my part.
Pride. Jealousy. Unbelief. Yup, those are the top three right now. I opened my Bible earlier today and it seemed like the words just washed over my eyes but never landed anywhere in my head. I couldn't absorb anything. I tried to pray but even that seemed so hard. I wonder what's happening right now. I'm afraid to dig into my heart. I secretly don't want to uncover anymore crap. It's inevitable, isn't it?
Pride. Jealousy. Unbelief. Yup, those are the top three right now. I opened my Bible earlier today and it seemed like the words just washed over my eyes but never landed anywhere in my head. I couldn't absorb anything. I tried to pray but even that seemed so hard. I wonder what's happening right now. I'm afraid to dig into my heart. I secretly don't want to uncover anymore crap. It's inevitable, isn't it?
Saturday, January 19, 2008
woooooohoooooooo!
I have good news! After moaning and groaning all week long. After fighting God all morning long to not weigh in. I finally decided to get my buns out of bed and over to Weight Watchers. Sir Chadwick gave me the ok to NOT weigh in and believe me I had every intention of staying in bed but the nudge woke me up. So, at 10:30am I round the stairs to Weight Watchers and open the door to face my week.
I step on the scale only find 2.6lbs less of myself!
Do you know what that means?!?!
I've lost a total of 50.8 lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Finally after weeks and weeks of 0.4lbs and 0.8lbs weight losses and expecting to reach a 50lbs weight loss goal by January 1st it's finally here on Saturday, January 19th! The second I heard the news I started to cry. I was so frustrated with trying so hard. I'm sure y'all could tell I was frustrated by my most recent posts. All I can say is that I'm so pleased it's finally here!
I couldn't wait to call Sir Chadwick. As I reached for my phone I noticed that my father was calling. He was able to get the first news. Earlier this week I called him in tears. One morning before work I found myself lost. Almost hopeless. I cried to my dad that I wasn't sure how I could ever be able to continue this journey and that I was afraid of letting everyone down. He instantly rebuked me, followed it with sweet words of encouragement then lead us into prayer. I'm so thankful for Godly parents.
Sir Chadwick was proud. When he answered the phone he almost sounded ready to hear good news. How could he have known? Well, I guess he must've had a good idea because he kicked my butt this week. What would I do without him? He's truly a God send.
I can't thank y'all enough for all your prayers and sweet words this week. Until the next post! Adios.
I step on the scale only find 2.6lbs less of myself!
Do you know what that means?!?!
I've lost a total of 50.8 lbs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Finally after weeks and weeks of 0.4lbs and 0.8lbs weight losses and expecting to reach a 50lbs weight loss goal by January 1st it's finally here on Saturday, January 19th! The second I heard the news I started to cry. I was so frustrated with trying so hard. I'm sure y'all could tell I was frustrated by my most recent posts. All I can say is that I'm so pleased it's finally here!
I couldn't wait to call Sir Chadwick. As I reached for my phone I noticed that my father was calling. He was able to get the first news. Earlier this week I called him in tears. One morning before work I found myself lost. Almost hopeless. I cried to my dad that I wasn't sure how I could ever be able to continue this journey and that I was afraid of letting everyone down. He instantly rebuked me, followed it with sweet words of encouragement then lead us into prayer. I'm so thankful for Godly parents.
Sir Chadwick was proud. When he answered the phone he almost sounded ready to hear good news. How could he have known? Well, I guess he must've had a good idea because he kicked my butt this week. What would I do without him? He's truly a God send.
I can't thank y'all enough for all your prayers and sweet words this week. Until the next post! Adios.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Robin’s Prediction was correct
Yesterday: Allow me to set the stage. During my lunch break I head to the gym (alone because earlier that morning I cancelled on Sir Chadwick). I know the routine well enough to know somewhat how to get along alone in the cardio room. So, I hop on the ArcTrainer. I make all the manual adjustments to the machine and get started. Oh, and because Sir Chadwick is out of the picture, for the day, I get to use my handy dandy iPod shuffle. Once I get my favorite tunes going I start pushing. The first 8-10 minutes were ok. No major sweating occurs at this time only a slight glimmer of evidence which points to the oncoming downpour. Sure enough my body starts working and the sweat starts pouring. Because Sir Chadly is nowhere in site I decide to be totally gross and NOT wipe my face of the sweat that is now literally dropping off the edge of my pudgy nose. The constant reaching for my towel, wiping and readjusting of my hand position on the machine is a distraction I don’t feel like messing with at the moment. Plus, in a sick way it was really really cool to see sweat puddle forming on the floor just below me. Ok, enough about the sweat…. I swear I get so distracted!
After a long 30 minutes on the ArcTrainer I hop off and grab the sanitizing wipes provided by the gym to clean up my sweaty mess. In the process of cleaning the machine this lady next to me is trying to start up a conversation but I’m hardly able to speak because my heart is still pounding and I can hardly breathe so she basically gets one word answers to all her questions. I bet she thought I was so rude. I actually feel awful for not talking more to her, maybe God will reintroduce me to her next time I’m in there. Anyhow, back to the story…. From the ArcTrainer I move to treadmill for an expected 15 more minutes of cardio. So, there I go to the treadmill. While waiting for the starting count down on the treadmill I get this slight tummy ach/cramp but it lower than normal so I thought “girlie stuff” must be brewing. The pain goes from slight to sharp in a matter of seconds then subsides quickly so I think I’m pretty much good to go. So, I go. Punch in 3.8 and I’m off.
Somewhere between 4-5 minutes I realize that I instantly “gotta go!” I start to panic because Sir Chadwick has drilled it in my head to never quick an exercise when your heart rate is still pretty high. I was somewhere in the 150’s when this started and I had to get down to the 130’s before I excuse myself. haha! With all my might I’m hanging on. I’m slowly dropping the pace. I’m patiently waiting for my heart rate drop. My body is now screaming. I hope y’all understand the gravity of the situation. When this girl’s gotta go – SHE”S GOTTA GO! So, now I’m walking at a 3.0 and my heart rate is dropping but it seems like it’s taking forever!!! I’m starting to freak out and now I’m sweating. It’s not the sweat you get from working out it’s the cold sweat you get when dread begins to grip your body. AND, to make matters worse because I’m freaking out my heart rate begins to rise!!!! Imagine my confusion! So, after what seems like years I’m finally clear. Long story short……….. I made it.
2 months ago: A group of us are at the GreenHouse and my friend, Robin, asks me “hey, Marcy have you ever worked out so hard that you’ve gotten instant diarrhea?” As most of my good friends know I love a good poopie story yet sadly I didn’t know what she was talking about. My answer to her question was “ummmm, no.” Then she says "It's ok. It'll happen." Then we went on to have a glorious poopie discussion. :)
Well, now I know!!! And, can I just tell you that even in those crazy moments of my life God is still so humorous and faithful. His timing is always perfect. Just imagine. No, seriously imagine how much worse that would’ve been had Sir Chadwick been in the picture. I WOULD HAVE DIED ON THAT TREADMILL because he would’ve pushed me to the end and I wouldn’t have had the guts to say “ummm excuse me Merciless Mike I GOTTA GO!!!” He would’ve scoffed and said “get to moving maggot! This is MY HOUSE! ” Ok, I exaggerate but still….. I would’ve seriously died! ROFL!
I hope y’all enjoyed that one. For those of you who don’t know this side of me…what can I say “I’m special”!
Love you!
After a long 30 minutes on the ArcTrainer I hop off and grab the sanitizing wipes provided by the gym to clean up my sweaty mess. In the process of cleaning the machine this lady next to me is trying to start up a conversation but I’m hardly able to speak because my heart is still pounding and I can hardly breathe so she basically gets one word answers to all her questions. I bet she thought I was so rude. I actually feel awful for not talking more to her, maybe God will reintroduce me to her next time I’m in there. Anyhow, back to the story…. From the ArcTrainer I move to treadmill for an expected 15 more minutes of cardio. So, there I go to the treadmill. While waiting for the starting count down on the treadmill I get this slight tummy ach/cramp but it lower than normal so I thought “girlie stuff” must be brewing. The pain goes from slight to sharp in a matter of seconds then subsides quickly so I think I’m pretty much good to go. So, I go. Punch in 3.8 and I’m off.
Somewhere between 4-5 minutes I realize that I instantly “gotta go!” I start to panic because Sir Chadwick has drilled it in my head to never quick an exercise when your heart rate is still pretty high. I was somewhere in the 150’s when this started and I had to get down to the 130’s before I excuse myself. haha! With all my might I’m hanging on. I’m slowly dropping the pace. I’m patiently waiting for my heart rate drop. My body is now screaming. I hope y’all understand the gravity of the situation. When this girl’s gotta go – SHE”S GOTTA GO! So, now I’m walking at a 3.0 and my heart rate is dropping but it seems like it’s taking forever!!! I’m starting to freak out and now I’m sweating. It’s not the sweat you get from working out it’s the cold sweat you get when dread begins to grip your body. AND, to make matters worse because I’m freaking out my heart rate begins to rise!!!! Imagine my confusion! So, after what seems like years I’m finally clear. Long story short……….. I made it.
2 months ago: A group of us are at the GreenHouse and my friend, Robin, asks me “hey, Marcy have you ever worked out so hard that you’ve gotten instant diarrhea?” As most of my good friends know I love a good poopie story yet sadly I didn’t know what she was talking about. My answer to her question was “ummmm, no.” Then she says "It's ok. It'll happen." Then we went on to have a glorious poopie discussion. :)
Well, now I know!!! And, can I just tell you that even in those crazy moments of my life God is still so humorous and faithful. His timing is always perfect. Just imagine. No, seriously imagine how much worse that would’ve been had Sir Chadwick been in the picture. I WOULD HAVE DIED ON THAT TREADMILL because he would’ve pushed me to the end and I wouldn’t have had the guts to say “ummm excuse me Merciless Mike I GOTTA GO!!!” He would’ve scoffed and said “get to moving maggot! This is MY HOUSE! ” Ok, I exaggerate but still….. I would’ve seriously died! ROFL!
I hope y’all enjoyed that one. For those of you who don’t know this side of me…what can I say “I’m special”!
Love you!
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Up to the Mountain
My girl, Amber, sent me this song to encourage me during this season but as you'll soon find out...I was utterly moved by the video.
Thank you, Amber! I now have a lump in my throat the size of New Jersey! I love you!
Thank you, Amber! I now have a lump in my throat the size of New Jersey! I love you!
Monday, January 14, 2008
Today is a new day
Instead of spending any more wasted time moaning about those things I do not currently have I’m choosing to remember….
a. Starting treadmill pace 1.5 - Current treadmill pace 3.8
b. Starting weight 372 lbs – Current weight 323.8 lbs
c. Starting size 30-32 - Current size 26-28
d. Starting accountability…next to none – Current accountability …immeasurable!
e. How do you measure the level of intensity at which we currently workout? I don’t know ….ask Mike. I’m sure he’ll be proud to boast.
f. Dependence on God…. I need a daily dose of humility to continually remind me that I’m not in control and it’s NOT about me!
Thank you for all the emails that poured into my inbox. Thank you for reminding me that I’m not alone. Thank you for pushing me through prayer and encouragement.
A super special thanks for my trainer and brother in Christ, Mike Chadwick (aka Sir Chadwick). Thank you for literally sweating it out with me. Thank you for pushing me even when I give you the evil eye. Thank you for pushing me way past my comfort zone and for believing in me. Thank you for not letting me “escape” the pain. Thank you for not letting me quit. Thank you for letting me cry – even when I don’t want to. Lastly, thank for you for praying with me.
I’m so thankful that our God would put so many Godly and faithful people in my life. I can’t even begin to express my gratitude for you all. My dear and faithful friend (Donna McMath - from Idaho) encouraged me to pick up a 50lb bag of salt and truck it around a bit to see what 50lbs feels like once it’s been off. Any other suggestions for a 50lbs pick up?! I’m gonna try it this week so I need ideas. I’ll let you know how that goes.
a. Starting treadmill pace 1.5 - Current treadmill pace 3.8
b. Starting weight 372 lbs – Current weight 323.8 lbs
c. Starting size 30-32 - Current size 26-28
d. Starting accountability…next to none – Current accountability …immeasurable!
e. How do you measure the level of intensity at which we currently workout? I don’t know ….ask Mike. I’m sure he’ll be proud to boast.
f. Dependence on God…. I need a daily dose of humility to continually remind me that I’m not in control and it’s NOT about me!
Thank you for all the emails that poured into my inbox. Thank you for reminding me that I’m not alone. Thank you for pushing me through prayer and encouragement.
A super special thanks for my trainer and brother in Christ, Mike Chadwick (aka Sir Chadwick). Thank you for literally sweating it out with me. Thank you for pushing me even when I give you the evil eye. Thank you for pushing me way past my comfort zone and for believing in me. Thank you for not letting me “escape” the pain. Thank you for not letting me quit. Thank you for letting me cry – even when I don’t want to. Lastly, thank for you for praying with me.
I’m so thankful that our God would put so many Godly and faithful people in my life. I can’t even begin to express my gratitude for you all. My dear and faithful friend (Donna McMath - from Idaho) encouraged me to pick up a 50lb bag of salt and truck it around a bit to see what 50lbs feels like once it’s been off. Any other suggestions for a 50lbs pick up?! I’m gonna try it this week so I need ideas. I’ll let you know how that goes.
Saturday, January 12, 2008
I don't understand
I worked extra hard this week. I measured everything that went into my body. I counted each point. I followed the plan. I refused temptation when it came my way and still today's weigh in was a total disappointment.
The feeling of being so incredibly close to your goal yet having it continue to stay just beyond your reach is such a painful/comforting reminder that we aren't in control. I have to confess that after getting the news that I only lost 0.8lbs this week my instant reaction was anger - directed toward God. I know it's a bold statement but it's honest. I was angry with him. I can't fully explain why....I was being a bratty punk.
Currently sitting at Panera Bread. When my food arrived at my table I sat before it for a few moments in total mental silence. I couldn't eat it yet my stomach was growling and my heart was aching for comfort, encouragement and repentence. I couldn't even eat without asking for forgiveness. The pride that so quickly wells up in my heart was subsided the instant I bowed my head in submission.
I can't run this race without Him. When I am weak He has promised to be strong. It's been a hard week in more ways that just weight loss.
Here's a text sent early this morning by my close friend/brutal accountability partner, Dane.
How could she have known? What would've motivated her to write such a text?
We all know the answer to that question....
All is well. As hard as it seems right now I know I won't quit. Thanks for stopping by today.
The feeling of being so incredibly close to your goal yet having it continue to stay just beyond your reach is such a painful/comforting reminder that we aren't in control. I have to confess that after getting the news that I only lost 0.8lbs this week my instant reaction was anger - directed toward God. I know it's a bold statement but it's honest. I was angry with him. I can't fully explain why....I was being a bratty punk.
Currently sitting at Panera Bread. When my food arrived at my table I sat before it for a few moments in total mental silence. I couldn't eat it yet my stomach was growling and my heart was aching for comfort, encouragement and repentence. I couldn't even eat without asking for forgiveness. The pride that so quickly wells up in my heart was subsided the instant I bowed my head in submission.
I can't run this race without Him. When I am weak He has promised to be strong. It's been a hard week in more ways that just weight loss.
Here's a text sent early this morning by my close friend/brutal accountability partner, Dane.
Hey friend! I just needed to tell you something this morning- even if by some chance you don't meet your goal weight today it's OKAY! God is still on His throne and LOVES YOU very much and it will still happen! So remember that today. Love ya
How could she have known? What would've motivated her to write such a text?
We all know the answer to that question....
All is well. As hard as it seems right now I know I won't quit. Thanks for stopping by today.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Spaghetti Arms
Sir Chadwick switched up the routine a bit. Any change in the routine is welcomed, yet I always have this twinge of apprehension. I always wonder “what if I can’t do this new stuff” or “Dang! What’s he’s got up his sleeve now!” My mind runs the gamut of emotions and thoughts so quickly I often forget what I’m feelings. I know women are strange that way…
We started warming up the Arc Trainer. It’s a fun little machine. I hope you picked up on the oozing sarcasm. Anyhow, we tried it a couple months ago but my body wasn’t ready for it. Apparently, now I’m ready for it… it feels like we hit that thing running on Monday. He instantly starts pushing in all these numbers to get the machine going. It asks for him for my weight and I see that the types in “325” and you know what my reaction was?!!? I started to lunge forward to say “oh wait! It’s 372.” Why in the world would I think I still weigh 372?!? Strange isn’t it? I mean it isn’t like I haven’t physically felt these past 47.4lbs dripping off my body. And, it isn’t like I haven’t reveled in each pound lost, but I still wonder what is happening in my head when my natural instinct is to say I weigh 372. Any suggestions?!
So, back to the routine….let me just tell you that it’s different. Initially I thought “wow, this isn’t that bad”……… WHATEVER!! Midway through the workout I was nasty, icky, and dripping with sweat. AND!!!! He added crunches! I knew it was just a matter of time before he incorporated those suckers! I just knew it! I’m not complaining though. The results are amazing. I feel so much better. I move better. Heck, I even look better. My face is rounding down, my upper arms are trimming/slimming, I’ve dropped at least 2 sizes and soon I’ll have to start taking my clothes to get altered because this girl isn’t buying new close until I have to.
So, Spaghetti arms…this is where the title came of this blog was birthed. I get to the office this morning and one of the guys comes over to my desk and hands me this printed email. He says “you’ve gotta read”. So, I grab the sheets from him and start reading, now mind you, I start reading the email and my arms are relaxed but firm and just a little bit away from my body, my arms start to hurt/ache so I swivel my chair around and lay my elbows on the top of my desk. I continue reading. At some point I realized that my arms continue to hurt and that for some reason I’m reading the worlds longest email ever! I can’t even focus on what I’m reading because I can’t get comfortable! Seriously, I can’t hold up 2 ,count them, 2 sheets of paper and 1 tiny staple or was it a paperclip?? – I can’t remember!! Anyhow, that’s not the point, the point is that those 2 sheets and one paperclip/staple felt like I was holding a 12lbs BABY! How sad is that!! So, hence…the spaghetti arms.
Random Info: The phase spaghetti arms came to life one summer while watching the movie Dirty Dancing on continual repeat with my siblings and cousin. Good times! Lots of living room dancing and movie quoting/singing… Oh, to be 10 again.
We started warming up the Arc Trainer. It’s a fun little machine. I hope you picked up on the oozing sarcasm. Anyhow, we tried it a couple months ago but my body wasn’t ready for it. Apparently, now I’m ready for it… it feels like we hit that thing running on Monday. He instantly starts pushing in all these numbers to get the machine going. It asks for him for my weight and I see that the types in “325” and you know what my reaction was?!!? I started to lunge forward to say “oh wait! It’s 372.” Why in the world would I think I still weigh 372?!? Strange isn’t it? I mean it isn’t like I haven’t physically felt these past 47.4lbs dripping off my body. And, it isn’t like I haven’t reveled in each pound lost, but I still wonder what is happening in my head when my natural instinct is to say I weigh 372. Any suggestions?!
So, back to the routine….let me just tell you that it’s different. Initially I thought “wow, this isn’t that bad”……… WHATEVER!! Midway through the workout I was nasty, icky, and dripping with sweat. AND!!!! He added crunches! I knew it was just a matter of time before he incorporated those suckers! I just knew it! I’m not complaining though. The results are amazing. I feel so much better. I move better. Heck, I even look better. My face is rounding down, my upper arms are trimming/slimming, I’ve dropped at least 2 sizes and soon I’ll have to start taking my clothes to get altered because this girl isn’t buying new close until I have to.
So, Spaghetti arms…this is where the title came of this blog was birthed. I get to the office this morning and one of the guys comes over to my desk and hands me this printed email. He says “you’ve gotta read”. So, I grab the sheets from him and start reading, now mind you, I start reading the email and my arms are relaxed but firm and just a little bit away from my body, my arms start to hurt/ache so I swivel my chair around and lay my elbows on the top of my desk. I continue reading. At some point I realized that my arms continue to hurt and that for some reason I’m reading the worlds longest email ever! I can’t even focus on what I’m reading because I can’t get comfortable! Seriously, I can’t hold up 2 ,count them, 2 sheets of paper and 1 tiny staple or was it a paperclip?? – I can’t remember!! Anyhow, that’s not the point, the point is that those 2 sheets and one paperclip/staple felt like I was holding a 12lbs BABY! How sad is that!! So, hence…the spaghetti arms.
Random Info: The phase spaghetti arms came to life one summer while watching the movie Dirty Dancing on continual repeat with my siblings and cousin. Good times! Lots of living room dancing and movie quoting/singing… Oh, to be 10 again.
Monday, January 7, 2008
I'm an Emotional Eater
I took this quiz online this afternoon AND, this is what I found out about my eating habits...big surprise. :)
Most of the results weren't a total surprise because God's been working on heart in this area. Actually, "working" is putting it nicely...He's been beating the mess out of me in this area!! I can't tell you how many times I've thought about going to food to numb something I've been trying NOT to feel only to have that gentle nudge from the Holy Spirit reminding me that God was willing and waiting for me. I hate to admit this but there have been times, more often than not, that I've actively chosen to ignore that sweet call.
Emotional Eater
You use food to affect your mood. This started as a conscious way to motivate yourself when you needed it, but then it became your second nature and turned into an unconscious method of dealing with problems.
Your Eating Habits
You are familiar with sweets, such as cookies, ice cream, cakes, waffles and other carb-loaded diet killers. They somehow creep into your diet whenever you need a little bit of moral support, or when you feel frustrated, unhappy or simply bored. Therefore, those excess calories are not consumed during your regular meals, but in between.
The Solution
Emotional cravings are not always easily recognizable as such. This is especially true for people who are used to eating snacks and sweets every once in a while. In those cases, emotional eating patterns only become evident when they have already taken place. Therefore, emotional eaters should plan their meals ahead, and always have a clear idea how much they want to consume. This makes any deviations clearly recognizable and allows the user to find alternate and non-food related methods for feeling better.
Great website: http://caloriecount.about.com
Most of the results weren't a total surprise because God's been working on heart in this area. Actually, "working" is putting it nicely...He's been beating the mess out of me in this area!! I can't tell you how many times I've thought about going to food to numb something I've been trying NOT to feel only to have that gentle nudge from the Holy Spirit reminding me that God was willing and waiting for me. I hate to admit this but there have been times, more often than not, that I've actively chosen to ignore that sweet call.
Emotional Eater
You use food to affect your mood. This started as a conscious way to motivate yourself when you needed it, but then it became your second nature and turned into an unconscious method of dealing with problems.
Your Eating Habits
You are familiar with sweets, such as cookies, ice cream, cakes, waffles and other carb-loaded diet killers. They somehow creep into your diet whenever you need a little bit of moral support, or when you feel frustrated, unhappy or simply bored. Therefore, those excess calories are not consumed during your regular meals, but in between.
The Solution
Emotional cravings are not always easily recognizable as such. This is especially true for people who are used to eating snacks and sweets every once in a while. In those cases, emotional eating patterns only become evident when they have already taken place. Therefore, emotional eaters should plan their meals ahead, and always have a clear idea how much they want to consume. This makes any deviations clearly recognizable and allows the user to find alternate and non-food related methods for feeling better.
Great website: http://caloriecount.about.com
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Songs that Gripped my Heart in 2007
Here's a basic list of songs that influenced my life this year.
Listed in no particular order.
Song Title & Artist
None but Jesus by Hillsong *On itunes alone I listened to this song 300 times! if you get a chance listen to it! It's one of those songs that you'll bypass initially but give it a chance it's anointed.
Almost Home by Craig Morgan * I just love this song. Craig Morgan has an incredible voice.
Shine On by Needtobreathe *It's my lifesong! AND, it motivates me to keep moving.
My Savior My God by Aaron Shust *one of my favorite songs to sing in the car
All My Praise by Selah *discovered this song while on a long thoughtful walk. I cried...
Higher by Hillsong *gives me goose bumps
As Long as the Day by Josh Drew *CAN NOT get enough of this song! I've been begging Josh for a copy of this song since the first time I heard it this last summer. I generally listen to it before bed or before prayer - WOW!!
I Am by Eddy James *My friend Dane introduced me to this one.
You are Better by Michael Bleeker *listen to it that's all I gotta say about this one! Puts your entire walk into prospective.
Burn us Up by Shane & Shane *this song took me by surprise. The entire cd, Papers, is well worth the investment! do it!
Listed in no particular order.
Song Title & Artist
None but Jesus by Hillsong *On itunes alone I listened to this song 300 times! if you get a chance listen to it! It's one of those songs that you'll bypass initially but give it a chance it's anointed.
Almost Home by Craig Morgan * I just love this song. Craig Morgan has an incredible voice.
Shine On by Needtobreathe *It's my lifesong! AND, it motivates me to keep moving.
My Savior My God by Aaron Shust *one of my favorite songs to sing in the car
All My Praise by Selah *discovered this song while on a long thoughtful walk. I cried...
Higher by Hillsong *gives me goose bumps
As Long as the Day by Josh Drew *CAN NOT get enough of this song! I've been begging Josh for a copy of this song since the first time I heard it this last summer. I generally listen to it before bed or before prayer - WOW!!
I Am by Eddy James *My friend Dane introduced me to this one.
You are Better by Michael Bleeker *listen to it that's all I gotta say about this one! Puts your entire walk into prospective.
Burn us Up by Shane & Shane *this song took me by surprise. The entire cd, Papers, is well worth the investment! do it!
Thursday, January 3, 2008
Plank Panic Attack
I don't know what possessed me...I was online and I Googled "Planks". Oh, the dread that hit my heart.
Check this out: Plank Hell!
I can't believe the madness gets worse!
Quick prayer to God: Dear Lord, please! Please! don't let Sir Chadwick ever remember to bring this into the gym. AMEN!
Check this out: Plank Hell!
I can't believe the madness gets worse!
Quick prayer to God: Dear Lord, please! Please! don't let Sir Chadwick ever remember to bring this into the gym. AMEN!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
Here are just a few pictures of the many that we took during our festivities.
Beautiful Amber Amber
Here are my Cheeky girls - Diane & Britt (we get each other - it was love at first laugh)
The Infamous Sir Chadly
Britt's facial expressions are PRICELESS!
Here's one of my biggest blessings... I heart her mucho!
Beautiful Amber Amber
Here are my Cheeky girls - Diane & Britt (we get each other - it was love at first laugh)
The Infamous Sir Chadly
Britt's facial expressions are PRICELESS!
Here's one of my biggest blessings... I heart her mucho!
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
Wrapping Up 2007
Looking back on the past couple of months it’s been pretty awesome and completely unbelievable. I can't say that my life is totally different, but in many ways it's so so very different. For instance, if someone had told me last January that the end of December 2007 I would've lost 47lbs I'd most likely smile, wish with all my heart that it would be true, but inevitably I wouldn't believe them.
During the early part of 2007 I was involved with a group called SideWire (a single’s social group organized by The Village Church) and it was there that I met Sir Chadwick. If someone had pointed him out to me and said “one day that guy will pour is life, time, energy, heart and soul into your freedom” I seriously seriously seriously would’ve doubted it. I’ve jokingly confessed to Sir Chadwick that my initial opinion of him wasn’t flattering. I judged him so harshly. My judgment stemmed for my own insecurities. Because he was athletic, because he said he was a personal trainer, because he was aloof, I thought he was self absorbed. Oh, how God has used that man to humble me… I’ve since learned but I was very very wrong about him. I keep thinking about that verse that says “Man sees the outer appearance but God sees the heart” Smack down for Marcy! Ouch!
If someone would've said to me that I'd be in a small group that I love love love love love I also wouldn't believe it. I totally begrudged home group! I was absolutely content with being a ghost at the Village church. It was so easy to come and go as I pleased. I LOVED not having true accountability. I know I used to be so shallow! :) God had other plans. He always does, doesn’t he?! Long story short I’m in a small group. I often can’t wait to get to small group. I can’t wait to see my girls. I can’t wait to talk Jesus, live life, laugh our heads off, and even cry eyes out. They've all taught me so much. I trust them. I rely on them. I need them. It’s so cool to see how only God could’ve orchestrated such a perfect union of women who are all SO DIFFERENT. We share such a special bond. Keeping our treasure would be selfish so as of January 14th we’re splitting. I had to take a quick moment before continuing to write because it saddens me to think that we’re splitting, but I’m encouraged to see what’s to come. I’ve been asked to lead this new group. I can only hope and pray that God will continue to do a mighty work within both groups. I know he will. Here's a quick picture of my girls.
Since returning from Seattle some mere 3 years ago it's pretty bizarre to see how much my life has changed. For those of you who knew me when.... you know exactly what I'm talking about. In short I was a total mess. We serve such an awesome and powerful God. Who are we that He would choose to call us His own? I’ll never understand His sovereignty but I rest in knowing that He’s got all under control.
There is so much more I could say about 2007.
During the early part of 2007 I was involved with a group called SideWire (a single’s social group organized by The Village Church) and it was there that I met Sir Chadwick. If someone had pointed him out to me and said “one day that guy will pour is life, time, energy, heart and soul into your freedom” I seriously seriously seriously would’ve doubted it. I’ve jokingly confessed to Sir Chadwick that my initial opinion of him wasn’t flattering. I judged him so harshly. My judgment stemmed for my own insecurities. Because he was athletic, because he said he was a personal trainer, because he was aloof, I thought he was self absorbed. Oh, how God has used that man to humble me… I’ve since learned but I was very very wrong about him. I keep thinking about that verse that says “Man sees the outer appearance but God sees the heart” Smack down for Marcy! Ouch!
If someone would've said to me that I'd be in a small group that I love love love love love I also wouldn't believe it. I totally begrudged home group! I was absolutely content with being a ghost at the Village church. It was so easy to come and go as I pleased. I LOVED not having true accountability. I know I used to be so shallow! :) God had other plans. He always does, doesn’t he?! Long story short I’m in a small group. I often can’t wait to get to small group. I can’t wait to see my girls. I can’t wait to talk Jesus, live life, laugh our heads off, and even cry eyes out. They've all taught me so much. I trust them. I rely on them. I need them. It’s so cool to see how only God could’ve orchestrated such a perfect union of women who are all SO DIFFERENT. We share such a special bond. Keeping our treasure would be selfish so as of January 14th we’re splitting. I had to take a quick moment before continuing to write because it saddens me to think that we’re splitting, but I’m encouraged to see what’s to come. I’ve been asked to lead this new group. I can only hope and pray that God will continue to do a mighty work within both groups. I know he will. Here's a quick picture of my girls.
Since returning from Seattle some mere 3 years ago it's pretty bizarre to see how much my life has changed. For those of you who knew me when.... you know exactly what I'm talking about. In short I was a total mess. We serve such an awesome and powerful God. Who are we that He would choose to call us His own? I’ll never understand His sovereignty but I rest in knowing that He’s got all under control.
There is so much more I could say about 2007.
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Non Weight Loss Post
This picture makes me laugh. I was trying to get a shot with the boys (Parker - my sister's MinPin and Roddey - my Poodle Mix) when my parent's dog, Maggie, decided to jump on my back and join in the fun.
I love dogs. Always have and I'm sure I always will. One of my favorite smells in the entire world is puppy breath. I know it's weird but I LOVE it! I love it almost as much as I love laughing.
PS My sister always jokes that out dogs seem to mimic our personalities. For instance, Parker is much like my sister in that he's sweet, well behaved, neat and loves to snuggle. My dog is much like myself in that he's not all that well behaved, he loves meeting new people, he has wild hair, he's independent,doesn't like to be messed with when he's sleeping and he's much more playful when it's chilly outside.
PPS I love the the expression on Roddey's face. I imagine he's thinking "ummm you up there! could you please get off of me!"
I love dogs. Always have and I'm sure I always will. One of my favorite smells in the entire world is puppy breath. I know it's weird but I LOVE it! I love it almost as much as I love laughing.
PS My sister always jokes that out dogs seem to mimic our personalities. For instance, Parker is much like my sister in that he's sweet, well behaved, neat and loves to snuggle. My dog is much like myself in that he's not all that well behaved, he loves meeting new people, he has wild hair, he's independent,doesn't like to be messed with when he's sleeping and he's much more playful when it's chilly outside.
PPS I love the the expression on Roddey's face. I imagine he's thinking "ummm you up there! could you please get off of me!"
Saturday, December 29, 2007
2007: The Last Weigh In
Just a quick update before we head out to lunch.
I'm back in Denton! I loved spending time with my family and friends, but it's the struggle to maintain sanity was ever present! Just teasing - my family (my mom) is wonderful just bit overzealous when it comes to serving. I don't know if it's the Mom in her or the Mexican in her but it almost felt like she NEVER stopped cooking!!
I'll tell you more about our stay later.
Current Weight: 325
Starting Weight: 372
Praise God for his NEVERENDING MERCY! I didn't have a weight gain this week!!!! I actually lost 0.8lbs! woohoo!!
Another quick note: thank you for praying for my sister! She did very well. She was sweet yet challenging. There were a number of occassions when she'd take something out of my hand (aka the yummy buttery biscuit) I swear I almost ate her hand off for taking it away from me. However, she survived and I'm beyond pleased for not gaining.
Oh, and one more thing... THANK YOU. THANK YOU! THANK YOU! for praying for me during this time. I needed it like you have no idea.
I found this verse today that I wish I had noticed earlier this week.
I'm back in Denton! I loved spending time with my family and friends, but it's the struggle to maintain sanity was ever present! Just teasing - my family (my mom) is wonderful just bit overzealous when it comes to serving. I don't know if it's the Mom in her or the Mexican in her but it almost felt like she NEVER stopped cooking!!
I'll tell you more about our stay later.
Current Weight: 325
Starting Weight: 372
Praise God for his NEVERENDING MERCY! I didn't have a weight gain this week!!!! I actually lost 0.8lbs! woohoo!!
Another quick note: thank you for praying for my sister! She did very well. She was sweet yet challenging. There were a number of occassions when she'd take something out of my hand (aka the yummy buttery biscuit) I swear I almost ate her hand off for taking it away from me. However, she survived and I'm beyond pleased for not gaining.
Oh, and one more thing... THANK YOU. THANK YOU! THANK YOU! for praying for me during this time. I needed it like you have no idea.
I found this verse today that I wish I had noticed earlier this week.
To him who is able to keep you from falling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy— 25to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen. Jude 1:24
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Calling all Prayer Peeps
Here's an email I had to send to my small group girls. Please read the following and pray along with them.
Hey ladies,
I'm emailing because I need y'all to go to battle for me. I've only been in Corpus 1 day and I'm already struggling with food. I sorta prepared myself mentally for this but it wasn't until about 10 minutes ago (while logging in my points for the day) that I realized that I'm way in over my head!!! I've been snacking all day. And, it won't be a surprise but I've already gone way way way over my allotted points for the day. I had a small 1.2lbs weight gain this morning during my weigh in and as y'all know any weight gain always throws my game off. So, please pray for me!! My goal is to finally reach 50lbs before Jan. 1st. I will do my part and continue to seek the Lords face for strength and power but I need an extra measure of support so I'm begging y'all to please lift me up. I know that truly God is behind this because anytime before this I would've never asked for help in this struggle...also pray for Margarita. Pray that she'll have the courage to confront my sin issues in regards to overeating or bored eating or whatever types of eating I do to get way or soothe and pray that I will wholehearted respond in humility. I soooo badly want these few pounds but more than weight loss I want freedom. Many of you share in this struggle with me but maybe not to this extreme so know that I am praying for y'all too. I love and miss you all.
Hey ladies,
I'm emailing because I need y'all to go to battle for me. I've only been in Corpus 1 day and I'm already struggling with food. I sorta prepared myself mentally for this but it wasn't until about 10 minutes ago (while logging in my points for the day) that I realized that I'm way in over my head!!! I've been snacking all day. And, it won't be a surprise but I've already gone way way way over my allotted points for the day. I had a small 1.2lbs weight gain this morning during my weigh in and as y'all know any weight gain always throws my game off. So, please pray for me!! My goal is to finally reach 50lbs before Jan. 1st. I will do my part and continue to seek the Lords face for strength and power but I need an extra measure of support so I'm begging y'all to please lift me up. I know that truly God is behind this because anytime before this I would've never asked for help in this struggle...also pray for Margarita. Pray that she'll have the courage to confront my sin issues in regards to overeating or bored eating or whatever types of eating I do to get way or soothe and pray that I will wholehearted respond in humility. I soooo badly want these few pounds but more than weight loss I want freedom. Many of you share in this struggle with me but maybe not to this extreme so know that I am praying for y'all too. I love and miss you all.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
No more head games....I'm back in the game!!
After a long 3 weeks I feel like I'm finally back in the game!! Saturday's weigh in went well to say the very least! I'm down another 6.6lbs!
Total weight Loss: 45 lbs!
Current Weight: 327 lbs
I can hardly believe that I started at 372 lbs.
During out morning workout my trainer says
Mike: "Hey Marce, you know you're 5 lbs away from 50lbs!"
Me: I say nothing but give him a satisfied smile while trying to keep my feet keep my feet on the treadmill.
Mike: "and 50 lbs is half way to what?!"
ME: I burst out with childish enthusiasm "100!!!"
Now I know y'all know that I can add/subtract but seriously............ 50lbs is half way to 100lbs! I can't believe how much my life has changed in the past 4 months. I'm excited to see what the next 4 months turn out. Keep praying!!!
Total weight Loss: 45 lbs!
Current Weight: 327 lbs
I can hardly believe that I started at 372 lbs.
During out morning workout my trainer says
Mike: "Hey Marce, you know you're 5 lbs away from 50lbs!"
Me: I say nothing but give him a satisfied smile while trying to keep my feet keep my feet on the treadmill.
Mike: "and 50 lbs is half way to what?!"
ME: I burst out with childish enthusiasm "100!!!"
Now I know y'all know that I can add/subtract but seriously............ 50lbs is half way to 100lbs! I can't believe how much my life has changed in the past 4 months. I'm excited to see what the next 4 months turn out. Keep praying!!!
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
No Post Update
I know I haven't posted in a good while. I've been rather blah! lately. I had a 2.6lbs weight gain before Thanksgiving. I took "control" and withheld way to many points, worked out extra hard and to my surprise I gained weight! So, uncool and totally not fair. Anyhow, during the week of Thanksgiving I did lose 1 lbs. I'm not done yet. I hope to do much better this week.
So, other than weight gain and loss I've been OK.... Working out with Mike is still hardcore. He pushed me way to hard this morning in the gym. I was almost starting to freak out about it too. I seriously thought that if he laid a finger on my shoulders during one my squat holds that I would mostly likely buckle under the pressure and strain - I was THAT tired!
I've cried more in these last couple of days than I've cried in so long. I'm currently going through this program at church called Recovery at the Village and it sucks! sucks! sucks! in a good way.
I'll give more details later. I just can't muster up the energy to do it now. Sorry for the delay in posts. I'll stay on top it and please forgive my lack of enthusiasm right now. I'm working through things.
Thank you for reading and praying.
So, other than weight gain and loss I've been OK.... Working out with Mike is still hardcore. He pushed me way to hard this morning in the gym. I was almost starting to freak out about it too. I seriously thought that if he laid a finger on my shoulders during one my squat holds that I would mostly likely buckle under the pressure and strain - I was THAT tired!
I've cried more in these last couple of days than I've cried in so long. I'm currently going through this program at church called Recovery at the Village and it sucks! sucks! sucks! in a good way.
I'll give more details later. I just can't muster up the energy to do it now. Sorry for the delay in posts. I'll stay on top it and please forgive my lack of enthusiasm right now. I'm working through things.
Thank you for reading and praying.
Monday, November 12, 2007
10% Goal
Victory tastes so sweet - even if it only comes in 10% increments. We (my trainer and I) finally reached our first goal!!! 10% of my starting weight was 37lbs. I missed it last week with a small weight gain of 1.2lbs. That 1.2lbs really took me for a surprise but I wasn't crushed as I was during my first weight gain. Thinking about it now I'm glad for that small weight gain because it continues to put this life transformation in perspective. I needed that small wake up call to step up my game. Soooooo, after our work out on Saturday morning Sir Chadwick (aka the trainer) gently reminded me that if we didnt get goal this week that we'd still have another week to tackle it. I left the gym hopeful that I did well this week. Nutrition was good. Exercise was hard. My hopes were high.
Weight Watchers: I was a bit nervous (can't explain why) but I ran in and was surprised to find that there wasn't a line. So, i checked in, took off my shoes, laid my things on the counter and waited for my invitation to step on the scale. So, the "weigher" (not sure what to call them) says "Hi, Marcy. Flex or Core?" I say "Flex" (FYI those are the weight watcher plan options - I do flex because it's easier for me to count my points) So, I step on the scale. I feel like I'm standing up there for an eternity. She says "sorry there's a problem with our system - it's so slow". NO joke! Anyhow, they've learned by now that I prefer them not to tell me how I've done because I like reading it for myself. I guess she either didn't remember or couldn't contain herself because she says "You've lost 5.8lbs! and you've reached GOAL!" I was elated! Elated to the point that I leaned over, laid my head on the counter, said a quick praise to our Father, and naturally got teary eyed and choked up. That reaction wouldn't be me otherwise, would it?! All that to say...I've not only reached my 37lb goal but I"ve surpassed it by an additional 2lbs! 39lbs total! wooohooo!!! I couldn't wait to tell Sir Chadwick!!
I called everyone! My sister, Donna Burke, my parents, Bianca, Sara, Diane, Britt, Robin, Brian...I couldn't talk fast enough!
So, when I finally got a hold of Mike he asks "So, how did you do at weight watchers?"
I tried to be so cool so I said in the most pathetic and pitiful voice I couldn't muster "oh, i didn't do that well. I gained 8lbs"
He shouts back "NO YOU DIDN'T!!"
I screamed "I KNOW!! WE GOT GOAL! I'VE LOST 39LBS!!!"
He was happy. I was happy. We were happy! I almost burst! I dont think I've ever heard him more exactly and he only said "that's GREAT, Marcy! I'm so proud of you!" I'll take what I can get from the man!
He later said "Oh, and don't ever try to be funny and tell me you gained 8lbs. I was already planning on starting two-a-days!"
Can you imagine? Two-a-days?!?! Are you serious?! I'd rather chew of my big toe than step into the gym more than once a day. Wow, talk about serious motivation to keep myself from going nuts on a pizza or whatever it is that i'm craving! NO THANK YOU!
Anyhow, I'm pumped! Totally pumped! Only 11lbs from 50lbs! I can't believe how great this feels. I've never felt this sort of accomplishment. Never Ever! I have a million things I'd love to post but that'll have to wait.
Thanks again and again for all your prayers, encouragements and compliments!!! I love you all!
Stayed tuned for my next post "Busted Up in a New Pair of Jeans"
Weight Watchers: I was a bit nervous (can't explain why) but I ran in and was surprised to find that there wasn't a line. So, i checked in, took off my shoes, laid my things on the counter and waited for my invitation to step on the scale. So, the "weigher" (not sure what to call them) says "Hi, Marcy. Flex or Core?" I say "Flex" (FYI those are the weight watcher plan options - I do flex because it's easier for me to count my points) So, I step on the scale. I feel like I'm standing up there for an eternity. She says "sorry there's a problem with our system - it's so slow". NO joke! Anyhow, they've learned by now that I prefer them not to tell me how I've done because I like reading it for myself. I guess she either didn't remember or couldn't contain herself because she says "You've lost 5.8lbs! and you've reached GOAL!" I was elated! Elated to the point that I leaned over, laid my head on the counter, said a quick praise to our Father, and naturally got teary eyed and choked up. That reaction wouldn't be me otherwise, would it?! All that to say...I've not only reached my 37lb goal but I"ve surpassed it by an additional 2lbs! 39lbs total! wooohooo!!! I couldn't wait to tell Sir Chadwick!!
I called everyone! My sister, Donna Burke, my parents, Bianca, Sara, Diane, Britt, Robin, Brian...I couldn't talk fast enough!
So, when I finally got a hold of Mike he asks "So, how did you do at weight watchers?"
I tried to be so cool so I said in the most pathetic and pitiful voice I couldn't muster "oh, i didn't do that well. I gained 8lbs"
He shouts back "NO YOU DIDN'T!!"
I screamed "I KNOW!! WE GOT GOAL! I'VE LOST 39LBS!!!"
He was happy. I was happy. We were happy! I almost burst! I dont think I've ever heard him more exactly and he only said "that's GREAT, Marcy! I'm so proud of you!" I'll take what I can get from the man!
He later said "Oh, and don't ever try to be funny and tell me you gained 8lbs. I was already planning on starting two-a-days!"
Can you imagine? Two-a-days?!?! Are you serious?! I'd rather chew of my big toe than step into the gym more than once a day. Wow, talk about serious motivation to keep myself from going nuts on a pizza or whatever it is that i'm craving! NO THANK YOU!
Anyhow, I'm pumped! Totally pumped! Only 11lbs from 50lbs! I can't believe how great this feels. I've never felt this sort of accomplishment. Never Ever! I have a million things I'd love to post but that'll have to wait.
Thanks again and again for all your prayers, encouragements and compliments!!! I love you all!
Stayed tuned for my next post "Busted Up in a New Pair of Jeans"
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Costume Party
Our small group girls hosted a costume party this weekend. As to be imagined we had so much fun! I went as a Roman "chic". My costume was pretty easy to put together (with the help of Sara and her mother) but it made it super hard to dance. I nearly tripped a million times through the night.
Here are just a few pictures of Saturday night.
Weight Loss Update
After an early morning workout with my trainer I headed over to Weight Watcher's. I expected/hoped for a 5lbs weight loss and I was certainly surprised! Low and behold it was 8.2lbs!!!! I'm so close to my 10% goal! Just a few more pounds and I'm there!
Total Weight Loss: 34.4lbs
Current Weight: 337.6lbs
Total Weight Loss: 34.4lbs
Current Weight: 337.6lbs
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Recent Encouragement! (looooong post)
Should've posted this on Wednesday....
Got to the gym today and found Mike (trainer) sitting out in one of the park benches eating his lunch. It was certainly a beautiful day. The air was crisp and the sun was shining. The wind was gentle yet firm - hard to explain. Headed in the gym to warm up but ended up having to make a pit stop in the ladies room. I know TMI! And, As I walked out of the ladies room I noticed Mike sitting in the waiting area for me. Embarrassing. I hope he wasn't waiting for me for a long while cause I was "occupied". We bypass the treadmills and head straight for the great outdoors. Of all the days to walk outside today was the perfect day!
He naturally sets the pace. We held to basic conversations about people we know, trash talking each other, and simple questions about each others likes and dislikes. As we near our regular turning point I notice that he continues past it. He looks back at me with a mischievous grin on his face. He likes to keep me on my toes and I like order! Monkey wrenches don't fare well in my life so I try to keep everything in my control. However, I've gotten to a point in our workouts where I trust him. I think he's got a good idea of my limitations and strength, maybe more so than I give him credit for. As we approach the end of our first leg, literally it was the end because the sidewalk ended, we turn around and he claps his hands and says "ok, now it's time to get down to business". I thinking... business?! what do you call this!? I've been in the business!! Apparently I wasn't because he stepped it up and continued to step it up.
Walking got faster and faster. He corrected my body position over and over until I finally got it. Tighten your abs. Squeeze your glutes. Lean forward a bit. Sounds easy enough but it adds to a great workout. I started to find myself breathless but my legs didnt hurt. My legs didn't hurt!! I had energy! I was motivated and just when I thought we were approaching our stopping point I asked "hey do you think we could cool down outside?" He looks over his shoulder and says "what makes you think we're finished?" I should've known! When we reached our original starting point, he makes a wide turn and begins to head back out on the trail. I must've given him a surprised/confused look cause he just smiled and kept walking.
I followed.
The pace was slightly slower but still brisk. I'm good. My breathing is starting to level out and still no pain anywhere. We walk alittle less than half of the way back and he tells me to take a quick break. The spot that he chose was perfect because it was under two trees that provided the perfect amount of shade. He asks how I felt. As I thought about his question I couldn't quite think of the words to describe how I was feeling other than to say "I feel great. Or Say, it's like wow! Or cool!" Because I felt all those things all at the same time. My limbs felt heavy yet my body felt energized and I could swear there was this weird buzzing in my body. The wind pushed past us just enough to cool us down without freezing us out.
As the break ended he said "Ok, push yourself hard. Pound it out. Just pound it out. Yell or make noise if you have." I had no idea what he was talking about. "Pound it out?" What does that mean? "Yell it out?" I was confused and concerned. Just how painful was this last leg going to be? Let me just tell you... It was hard! AND It was satisfying! I couldn't have gone any faster without jogging. He made some joke about running sprints and I told him that he if could get me to run and run well that I'd do just about anything for him. and i mean it! I would! I've always wanted to run. The last time I ran was when I was 12. My family was in Mexico and my siblings and I were at some park in downtown Merida. I don't know why we were running but we ran so hard that my legs went numb. It was exhilarating. I've missed it for so many years. So, if Mike can help me to run again I pretty much will do anything within my power for him.
I don't know how long it took us to finish but I do know that the last 5 minutes were hard. So hard!! He pushed me the entire way by encouraging me to pound harder, walk faster, continue my pace and not fall behind, not to give up. He clapped for me. And, I felt like I was accomplishing something great. When I reached my finish line he guided me through this empty parking lot adjacent to a park. Our pace slowly slowed and my breathing settled. I can't remember what we talked about because my insides were screaming GLORY! I wanted to throw my hands up in the air and worship my Lord. I wanted to walk over this grassy area and fall on my face. Our Father felt so real to me at the moment and all I could do was walk in silence. The forming lump in my throat was making it hard for me to breathe. All I could do was smile to myself. Gratitude. Appreciation. Overwhelming joy. I wondered why our God and Father would be so faithful to me. Mike is faithful to our Lord by serving me so diligently and My Lord is so faithful to me... faithful to me?!?!! A girl who's so incredibly unfaithful, selfish, jealous, envious, and unappreciative. Why Lord?! Why would you love me so much?
I briefly shared my last thought with Mike and he suggested that we head over to a park bench to talk. The entire way to the bench I had to keep myself from crying. Crying out in mercy and overwhelming joy for my Father. When we got to the bench and seated ourselves I asked for a moment. After a quick mental praise we started talking. He again praised me for my hardworking efforts. Asked me how I felt physically, & mentally. I could hardly speak without crying. I hate that about myself. I'm so sentimental! I love that I can openly praise our Lord in front of him without being shy or worried that he'll think I'm nuts- he's a believer too by the way. After I shared how I felt, I asked him something that's been on my mind for so long. I wanted to know why he pours so much time into me. Why he gets up so early in the morning to meet me at the gym. Why?! It doesnt make sense to me! It really doesnt make sense to me because that form of service is so unreal. I know service. I serve. I love my girls but it would be hard for me to get up on my days off to meet them at the gym but Mike lays it out, he puts it all out there for the Lord. Humbling. Yes, humbling is the only thing that comes to mind.
He said that he does it because I inspire him. He says that I make it easy for him to get up in the morning because he knows how hard I work. and how dedicated I am. As a trainer he couldnt ask for more. Also, says that I'm fun to hang out with. I dont really remember what else he said because my head was swimming. If only he knew I worked so because he motivates me to work hard. If only he knew that because I know how much time and effort he puts into training me causes me to make better choices when I eat or workout alone. Because of the accountability that he provides I love and respect him enough to not let him down. God, yet again, orchestrated a perfect partnership. So, I shared my heart with him and told him pretty much everything I just fore mentioned. His response: "good then I'll just work harder!" :)
God's timing is always perfect. God's timing is ALWAYS perfect! I'm leaving my first 30 years behind me now. I look forward to freedom. I look forward to the day of full restoration. I look forward to loving and serving our Lord completely.
Got to the gym today and found Mike (trainer) sitting out in one of the park benches eating his lunch. It was certainly a beautiful day. The air was crisp and the sun was shining. The wind was gentle yet firm - hard to explain. Headed in the gym to warm up but ended up having to make a pit stop in the ladies room. I know TMI! And, As I walked out of the ladies room I noticed Mike sitting in the waiting area for me. Embarrassing. I hope he wasn't waiting for me for a long while cause I was "occupied". We bypass the treadmills and head straight for the great outdoors. Of all the days to walk outside today was the perfect day!
He naturally sets the pace. We held to basic conversations about people we know, trash talking each other, and simple questions about each others likes and dislikes. As we near our regular turning point I notice that he continues past it. He looks back at me with a mischievous grin on his face. He likes to keep me on my toes and I like order! Monkey wrenches don't fare well in my life so I try to keep everything in my control. However, I've gotten to a point in our workouts where I trust him. I think he's got a good idea of my limitations and strength, maybe more so than I give him credit for. As we approach the end of our first leg, literally it was the end because the sidewalk ended, we turn around and he claps his hands and says "ok, now it's time to get down to business". I thinking... business?! what do you call this!? I've been in the business!! Apparently I wasn't because he stepped it up and continued to step it up.
Walking got faster and faster. He corrected my body position over and over until I finally got it. Tighten your abs. Squeeze your glutes. Lean forward a bit. Sounds easy enough but it adds to a great workout. I started to find myself breathless but my legs didnt hurt. My legs didn't hurt!! I had energy! I was motivated and just when I thought we were approaching our stopping point I asked "hey do you think we could cool down outside?" He looks over his shoulder and says "what makes you think we're finished?" I should've known! When we reached our original starting point, he makes a wide turn and begins to head back out on the trail. I must've given him a surprised/confused look cause he just smiled and kept walking.
I followed.
The pace was slightly slower but still brisk. I'm good. My breathing is starting to level out and still no pain anywhere. We walk alittle less than half of the way back and he tells me to take a quick break. The spot that he chose was perfect because it was under two trees that provided the perfect amount of shade. He asks how I felt. As I thought about his question I couldn't quite think of the words to describe how I was feeling other than to say "I feel great. Or Say, it's like wow! Or cool!" Because I felt all those things all at the same time. My limbs felt heavy yet my body felt energized and I could swear there was this weird buzzing in my body. The wind pushed past us just enough to cool us down without freezing us out.
As the break ended he said "Ok, push yourself hard. Pound it out. Just pound it out. Yell or make noise if you have." I had no idea what he was talking about. "Pound it out?" What does that mean? "Yell it out?" I was confused and concerned. Just how painful was this last leg going to be? Let me just tell you... It was hard! AND It was satisfying! I couldn't have gone any faster without jogging. He made some joke about running sprints and I told him that he if could get me to run and run well that I'd do just about anything for him. and i mean it! I would! I've always wanted to run. The last time I ran was when I was 12. My family was in Mexico and my siblings and I were at some park in downtown Merida. I don't know why we were running but we ran so hard that my legs went numb. It was exhilarating. I've missed it for so many years. So, if Mike can help me to run again I pretty much will do anything within my power for him.
I don't know how long it took us to finish but I do know that the last 5 minutes were hard. So hard!! He pushed me the entire way by encouraging me to pound harder, walk faster, continue my pace and not fall behind, not to give up. He clapped for me. And, I felt like I was accomplishing something great. When I reached my finish line he guided me through this empty parking lot adjacent to a park. Our pace slowly slowed and my breathing settled. I can't remember what we talked about because my insides were screaming GLORY! I wanted to throw my hands up in the air and worship my Lord. I wanted to walk over this grassy area and fall on my face. Our Father felt so real to me at the moment and all I could do was walk in silence. The forming lump in my throat was making it hard for me to breathe. All I could do was smile to myself. Gratitude. Appreciation. Overwhelming joy. I wondered why our God and Father would be so faithful to me. Mike is faithful to our Lord by serving me so diligently and My Lord is so faithful to me... faithful to me?!?!! A girl who's so incredibly unfaithful, selfish, jealous, envious, and unappreciative. Why Lord?! Why would you love me so much?
I briefly shared my last thought with Mike and he suggested that we head over to a park bench to talk. The entire way to the bench I had to keep myself from crying. Crying out in mercy and overwhelming joy for my Father. When we got to the bench and seated ourselves I asked for a moment. After a quick mental praise we started talking. He again praised me for my hardworking efforts. Asked me how I felt physically, & mentally. I could hardly speak without crying. I hate that about myself. I'm so sentimental! I love that I can openly praise our Lord in front of him without being shy or worried that he'll think I'm nuts- he's a believer too by the way. After I shared how I felt, I asked him something that's been on my mind for so long. I wanted to know why he pours so much time into me. Why he gets up so early in the morning to meet me at the gym. Why?! It doesnt make sense to me! It really doesnt make sense to me because that form of service is so unreal. I know service. I serve. I love my girls but it would be hard for me to get up on my days off to meet them at the gym but Mike lays it out, he puts it all out there for the Lord. Humbling. Yes, humbling is the only thing that comes to mind.
He said that he does it because I inspire him. He says that I make it easy for him to get up in the morning because he knows how hard I work. and how dedicated I am. As a trainer he couldnt ask for more. Also, says that I'm fun to hang out with. I dont really remember what else he said because my head was swimming. If only he knew I worked so because he motivates me to work hard. If only he knew that because I know how much time and effort he puts into training me causes me to make better choices when I eat or workout alone. Because of the accountability that he provides I love and respect him enough to not let him down. God, yet again, orchestrated a perfect partnership. So, I shared my heart with him and told him pretty much everything I just fore mentioned. His response: "good then I'll just work harder!" :)
God's timing is always perfect. God's timing is ALWAYS perfect! I'm leaving my first 30 years behind me now. I look forward to freedom. I look forward to the day of full restoration. I look forward to loving and serving our Lord completely.
"Who among the gods is like you, O LORD ? Who is like you— majestic in holiness, awesome in glory, working wonders? Exodus 15:11
Monday, October 22, 2007
WOW!!!!
:) Amazing, huh?!??! Last I checked I was at a total of 26.2lbs weight loss and I'm sure it's more than that now...Thanks you for all your support and PRAYERS!!!
My Birthday Party
Hello Beautiful Birthday Skirt!!
My super Chica, DANE!!
AWWWW RENATTA!!!
These are just a few images from the party. I'll upload all the images to shutterfly and post the link later.
Thanks for stopping by!!!
PS Congrats Robin and Hwa with your recent engagement!! woohoo!!
My super Chica, DANE!!
AWWWW RENATTA!!!
These are just a few images from the party. I'll upload all the images to shutterfly and post the link later.
Thanks for stopping by!!!
PS Congrats Robin and Hwa with your recent engagement!! woohoo!!
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