I don't want it to look like crazy Mexican Hair...

12pm on New Years Eve I decide to get my hair cut. My stylist has been forever begging me to try highlights. I give in on the condition that it would be subtle and flattering. What i really wanted to say was "Please, don't give me crazy Mexican hair!" but I could hardly say that as she is Mexican and she does have crazy Mexican hair... I should've known better! 

I did say SUBTLE right?!?! Anyhow, I knew I was in big trouble after she washed my hair and with a full head of soaking wet hair I could so clearly and easily see a HUGE ORANGE streak right across the top of my head. 

I didnt' know what to do. She could tell that I wasn't diggin' it because she continued to say things like "wow, that looks so great!" "oh, you just wait and see how many compliments you get" "wow! isn't this so pretty?" she'd say to anyone within earshot.... I wasn't buying it. I left there and went straight to an unbiased opinion. My sister. 

My first impression of her first impression = not impressed! 

She laughed at me. Then she got mad at me for being so dumb! Even more so she was mad because we were going to a NEW YEAR'S EVE PARTY!!! She made me swear that I'd never EVER try any of my hair shenanigans on her wedding day. 

Here are the results...... 

 

 

 

Shortly after taking this picture (documentation of my stupidity) I went back to the salon. A bit awkward walking back in there but I had to get it taken care of. She ended up adding a toner that got most of the crazy out but I'm still "off". AHHHH why did I do this to myself?!?!

I don't want to post this

As of this very morning at 10:44am I weigh 336.2lbs

Starting Weight: 372lbs
Biggest Loss: 66 lbs
What I've gained since I ended the Master Cleanse and left it at 305 lbs: 31.2lbs
Just in case you're wondering I'm a pound short of gaining half of what was lost....

Goal for this week:
TRACK ALL MY FOOD on weightwatchers.com
Meet with a new trainer

Drag Blogger

What can I say? It's been a total drag being a blogger. I haven't wanted to blog for many reason. First, I've felt that my journey hasn't been worth blogging about because everything seems to be flying in the crap hole. Secondly, because of shame. Thirdly, because of ....more shame.

Ok, real number time.....
I've gained weight. A lot of weight. I can feel it on my body. I feel heavy again. Not that being my size doesn't feel heavy all the time but I can feel the added weight and how it affects my quality of life. My belly sits lower (who am I kidding?...it hangs lower over my body) my arms are becoming "un"toned and larger, my double chin seems to have a cousin now and they're living on my face!!! It's harder to cross my legs. And, all my jeans are completely uncomfortable. Last I checked I had gained about 23lbs of the 66lbs that were originally lost. I didn't weigh in last week so the number might be higher. And, as you know.... I haven't wanted to admit and least of all have I wanted to blog this and I can't believe I just did it.

I can't seem to make myself track my food on weight watchers. It's almost as if I have this inner rebellion deep within myself that refuses to do what I know will help. I also haven't been working out as I know I can. There are so many things floating in my heart at the moment I find myself having a hard time grasping any idea long enough to solidify it into this blog.

Over thanksgiving I gained 9 lbs. It must have been the oreo cheesecake I found myself unable to pull away from or maybe it was the pecan pie? Actually, it was everything coupled with no exercise. Seriously, I know it's an easy concept. Formula = Eat well + working out = weight loss (calories in - calories out). However, as believers our formula isn't so easy. God never guarantees such a formula...

I had dinner with some friends this week and one the young ladies said something that has been on my heart and mind all week. She was talking about how people often think that they need to have a "WOW" relationship with God to know that He's working and moving in their lives. She admitted that she hardly ever has those "WOW" moment but what she does know is that in her lifetime Obedience does equal blessing. *I've had to pause for a moment to continue thinking about what she said.* Obedience does equal blessing. Blessings do not always encompass more money in your bank account, health, a great looking body and a Fiiiine man at your side. His blessings are so much deeper and often much more subtle, aren't they?

So, I leave this blog feeling better. I laid it out there. The accolades have pretty much ceased and I've learned that I found more pleasure in hearing them than worshiping the one who gave me the strength to complete the task at hand. He's had to remove my idols and I've fallen and cried without them. He's still pulling and stretching and poking and I have to admit that I'm mad at Him at times. I wish He would make this walk easier. I know He can snap his fingers and this battle would be over, but I also know He's lovingly doing something powerful. Please, keep praying.

Merry Christmas!! Yes, I said CHRISTMAS!

This is your Christmas card.

Merry Christmas!
I'm specifically NOT saying Happy Holiday or Season's Greeting because this is my blog. :)
Love Y'all!

Snoop Taters

I don't even know how I came across this on YouTube but it made me laugh.

FYI I don't like white pepper either. You'll see...

Savannah Jingle Bell Run

Two weeks ago we participated in the Savannah Jingle Bell Run. It was a 3k run or a 1 mile dog walk. Fuuunnn!!

Here's Me with my pup, Roddey & my sister with her, Parker Poo Poo.

Here's a picture of our event shirt. Nice, huh?

It was a small group event and what's a small group event without photos!!! Here's one of my favorite people with the sweetest heart, Kristi!

Forgot to mention that I got forth place but should've come in third but that's another story!! We also got a participation ribbon too! My very first ribbon! Exciting!

Wow Video

On occasion I get emails from The Weight We Were and today I send one of the most inspirational stories.

Please, watch the video below and you'll quickly see why.

Great Find!

I did a little shopping during lunch and before I realized it, it was time for me to head back to the office. While in a total pinch for "fast food", I didn't want to eat fast food. So, I drove around a bit thinking I could head over to Chick-Fil-A then noticed that the line was crazy long. I sat at a stop sign until I remembered that Target had semi good food in the deli section.

Off to Target I go. To my utter surprise I found something so totally delicious and completely healthy!! Archer Farms Veggies and Hummus for only ....wait for it.... wait for it.... $1.49!!!!

*Sigh*

I needed to be reminded of this song today because I feel blah....

Chicharron

This is chicharron, the Mexican version of pork rinds. I know it sounds disgusting but don't knock it till you try it. All you need is some salt, cilantro, diced onion, lime or lemon and a fresh corn tortilla and you're set to go! PS don't even ask me how many points these are....

HA HA Moment

My sister absolutely can't stand that I can't pose for a "cute" picture! She swears that I make an awful model because I can't help myself from laughing uncontrollably or from making awkward facial expressions. The first two were semi normal and I thought I did a great job...

This is me still being good...

And, these last two are when the giggles begin to set in.... This is where she began to say "Ok, come on Marce, just settle down. Just a few more. Be serious and just pose."

But, I couldn't help myself!!!

This was the last picture before she walked off... I wish I could say I was sorry, but I'm not! haha! Love you, Mita.

South Texas Grown

For those of you who don't know my family let me give you a little bit of a background. My mom was born and mostly raised in Merida, Yucatan on the Mexican Peninsula and she eats EVERYTHING with chile! And, one of the most components of her chile is lemon. So, what you see below is a South Texas grown lemon and next to it is a regular sized tomato.

This here is our "puppy" or Dad... He's not all about taking photos, but my sister threatened him so he caved and here he is...

HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS...

Decided to wear a ball cap to work today (we only dress up if we're meeting with clients) and I also decided to apply my make-up in the car. Everything was a perfect glow, including my C.O. Bigelow Coral Mint lip gloss, when I decided to apply the final touch ...mascara. (OK, OK! I know I broke a rule! everyone knows that lip anything always last but I decided to switch it up a bit and I got totally jinx!) Sooooo, I push the cap all the up to the top of my forehead to begin applying eye make up.

My right eye is perfectly perfect so I move to the left eye. I apply the first round of mascara the ball cap begins slip down my forehead so I readjust but evidently not enough because when I went to go in for round two of the mascara process...I miss my eyelash (because the dang cap got in the way) and stab myself in the freaking eye!!!! Now, my left eye is a total mess. Black mascara is now totally smudged both above and below my eyelashes. I immediately run my fingers to my eye to begin cleaning up the mess only to find that I STILL HAVE LOTION ON MY HANDS!! So, now my eye is burning as all get out, my make up is ruined on the left side of my face and I can hardly see!!!

Moral of the story....apply your make up at home and never wear a ball cap while applying mascara!

Super Sprint

Ok, it's official! I found a triathlon that I know I can finish.

The King Tut Tri will offer two events. The sprint triathlon will encompass a 500 meter swim, 12 mile ride, and 3.1 mile run while the Super Sprint AKA My First Tri will encompass a 300 meter swim, 6 mile ride and 2 mile run.

Save the Date: April 19th in McKinney, Texas

I'm doing this! It's motivating to finally have a goal insight.

Post Weekend

I lost .8 lbs last week. Even though i'm on the program I don't really feel "on the program" if you know what I mean. This morning I woke up with a heaviness over the impossibility of weight loss which I hadn't felt in so long, maybe even since before I started this program over a year ago.

My natural tendency is just to say "hey it's the holiday's....just start at the beginning of next year!" What a bag full of bull! It's all about choices. It's all a one day at a time deal. Between now and Thanksgiving I'll do my best to keep doing my best not this half-assedness I've been hitting lately.

FYI it's not just weight loss that is half-assed either! It's my spiritual life, it's my friendships, it's exercises, this blog ....it's EVERYTHING!! So, my goals for the week are to keep track of all my points between Monday - Friday, exercise with Kourtney 4-5 days of our 6 day schedule, and blog at least once more week. And, my upmost goal is to actually spend some quality time alone (totally alone and mentally there) before the Lord.

For those of you out there that read this blog...................please, ask me how my goals are going this week.

Quick Update

Hello Everyone!

I hope you enjoyed the pictures! It's been a busy few weeks on the Marcy Show.

I'm gonna try to make this short and sweet.

First off...I've not blogged because I've felt like a total loser! I mean the entire purpose of this blog was to track this weigthLOSS journey and because I've been gaining weight I really felt like blogging was pointless.

The fast went well. I got all the way down to 305lbs. Gained 8 lbs after my first meal. Then slowly ate my way back up to my starting weight. BUT, dang did my insides feel nice and clean!

A few weeks after my birthday bash and a few other parties I decided to (re)join Weight Watchers. My first weigh in was to be expected. It was both nice and a total surprise that the ladies missed me and remembered me. There was no love lost there...and no mercy either! I gained more than I realized. I was back up to 325lbs!

My second weigh in was last week and I lost 1.8lbs. Yah! for Marcy...it's a slow roll but I seriously can't fall off the wagon again until next summer! So, i'll need someone to kick my @#$@ sometime next year around May'ish. ok?

Not sure where Sir Chadwick and I are... we were sorta working out as partners not as trainer and trainee then it all sorta fell apart. I'm sad but I know it's for the best. He more than kinda ripped me a new one last week. Pretty much said that I couldn't rely on people to continually ask me where I am with working out and eating because it was high time that I got to doing it on my own for myself...ouch, huh? Well, I respect him a I took it like a big girl and didn't cry.

I've just recently started working out with a girl from my small group - we
re tri-training. I'll be sure to send you lots of funny stories of our escapades.

I'm excited about writing again. I'd normally blog during the day at work when my brain needed a break from numbers but here lately I've been way too busy to even think straight. I'll try to figure something out.

Thanks for your patience. Really.

Another Costume Party!

This year I decided to do something a little different. Ok, i just lied! I was so totally running out of time and ideas so I came up with this little number with the help of my sister and friend D. I wonder if you'll figure out what I am. PS.....I'm not a CAT!

FYI She's NOT Pocahontas!!! She's NATIVE AMERICAN!!!

Kristen! In all the years of knowing this chica this costume totally freaked me out! She's normally so quiet and laid back and to see her as hard core punk rocker sorta shocked me.

One of many "Un-Waldo's"

I'm a SKUNK!!!! Isn't that the cutest tail ever?!?!

My 31st Birthday

My 31st birthday went off with a bang! I was able to share it with people that I love and admire. Here are a few pics of the evening.

There was a Margarita Machine... and I may/or may not have had more than my fair share of drink for the night....

The theme of the party - Food that beings with an "M". Everyone was so creative! They provided goodies such as Mmmm Veggies, M&M, , McCandy, McSnickers, Musketteers, Macaroni and Cheese, Marzipan, Mississippi Mud Pie, Margarita's, Mexican Nachos & Marcy says fruit dip starts with an "M" fruit tray.

Good times! Krissie, Amber, Myself, Diane & Britt!

Nothing like a sneaky photo opp! This picture still makes me smile!

Hello Pumpkin!

This is our pumpkin! Isn't it just so cute?! I got this idea from a recent Southern Living Magazine. I had help with the stencil (thanks MITA!) and the carving was mostly done when during my cleanse. Good times.

One more thing...

I seriously can't stand the smell of maple syrup or lemons or cayenne pepper right now. The combination just makes me wanna gag. Ok, just thinking about it makes me wanna gag.

I'm going to my happy place now.

Death of the Master Cleanse

I can't tell you how glad I am to be over with the Master Cleanse. Thursday night I started eating again. Well, not eating real food just raw veggies and fruit. I took it pretty easy as to not upset my stomach and it worked.

Friday, I had fresh orange juice for breakfast and some veggie tacos for lunch and then I hit the big time for dinner! We went to Panera!!! Broccoli Cheddar in a bread bowl never tasted so yummy!

Now, let me just give you a little bodily background and catch you up to speed. Since I stopped taking the laxative tea at night and in the morning and since I stopped drinking the lemonade I noticed that my body was no longer producing "movements". I also noticed that I started feeling pretty heavy. So, I checked the scaled and noticed that I had gained 8 lbs over night! I was discouraged but not totally disappointed. I simply waited it out and it paid off.

Well, as of today I'm sorta back to normal. I was finally able to "go" and that obviously helped with weight loss but I'm not back to 305lbs as I was right before going back to normal food. I think my body is holding on to water in a major way!!! I had to take one of my rings off because I was that bloated. I've easily had about 1/2 gallon of water today and I've only had to go once or twice since waking up this morning.

Ok, enough about my bodily functions!

Here are some interesting perks of the Cleanse.
On day 3 or 4 I noticed that I could smell so much more.
I could smell people's breath from 4 feet way (good, bad and ugly). I could smell their previous meal coming off their pores.
I felt more mentally alert. I could concentrate so much better.
I slept so much better. By 10:30pm I was more than ready for bed and by 6am I was up and ready to go!!
My morning breath so was different too! I can't explain it but it almost tasted OK unlike the norm when I can't wait to brush my teeth.
I was more perky that normal. And for those of you who know me I can't say that you'd characterize me as perky...
My body also began to feel clean. It's an odd sensation but it seriously felt clean. Hard to explain.
My sister did notice that my skin was "off" color. I think it looked better but she seems to think I looked sickly...I think she's crazy!
Oh, and this was totally great! For some weird reason I noticed that both my feet and legs were looking much smaller than normal. I remember checking out my toes and thinking "wow they look so much smaller". So I pointed it out to my sister and she told me to try on the "Shoes". You know that one pair of shoes that we all own that are total murder to put on and wear but we can't stand to give them up because they're so cute...yeah that pair. I went and grabbed them from my closet and it's awesome to report that my feet slipped right in. I loved it!!!

So, I'm off to start my weekend festivities. Thanks for reading!

Master Cleanse VI

I'm still sorta fasting. I had to consume fresh orange juice all day yesterday in order to prepare my digestive tract for food. Last night after work I had some broth from a vegetable soup I made the night before. My body seemed fine with accepting it but I didn't want to push it and consume more.

I waited a few more hours, ran some errands, met with a friend, continued to consume more orange juice and returned home around 9pm to find that I was still feeling fine and a little hungry. I then decided to try to try a little more broth but this time I added a few veggies (carrots, celery, cabbage, squash, zucchini). And, can I just tell you that it was the most delicious, and most satisfying soup I'd ever had! OK, I exaggerate.... but it was good!

This morning I weighed in at an even 305 lbs. I'm excited that I didn't gain. I'm excited with the prospect of finally conquering a huge milestone but I'm also a bit sad that I'm back to where I was all those months ago. I'm so close to my goal of finally getting out of the 300's yet I'm so afraid to hope for success.

It's inexplicable. I can't understand this self destruction. I do, however, understand that I began to find my worth in weight loss. I began to feel that this blog, this journey and even parts of myself were almost worthless if I wasn't losing weight. The battle is still present. I still have to believe (and struggle to understand) that God isn't more in love with a future version of me but instead loves me as I am. I know I'm not alone in this battle.....

Thanks for stopping by today.

I'm a little happy! Can you tell?

Preparing my meal.

Yup, all the citrus went into a freshly squeezed 8 oz of OJ. Nice...

I used to be really picky about pulpy OJ but as of today I LOVE IT!! I got to actually use my teeth!! Dear sweet chewable orange pulp... I love you! I love you!

I ABHOR SALTY WATER!!

Woke up early this weekend to start my 32 oz of Sea Salt Water. I stared down the barrell of that straw for 30 minutes!

This is the picture that makes my sister laugh so hard!
Apparently she thinks my jacked up hair and pouty morning face is funnier than words!

This is all you need

This is all you need for the Master Cleanse. Oh, yeah and WATER!

Master Cleanse V

I hope you can appreciate this story as much as I have... I went to Sprouts last night because I needed to load up on some oranges for today's diet change. While at Sprouts I also decided to take care of a few regular groceries. I noticed some black seedless grapes and remembered that they're my sister's favorite. So, without thinking I pinched one off for a little taste. I seriously don't like sour grapes. Before I knew or even realized it I had both eaten and NOT SAVORED my one and only bite since Friday!

First I was scared that I was going to make myself totally sick. Secondly, I was appalled that I didn't spend anytime really thinking about how good it might have tasted had I not been in robot shopping mode. I was so sad.... I waited for something traumatic to happen. I waited some more. Kept on waiting as I felt the grape slip down my esophagus down into my empty stomach.... still waiting. Nothing.

Ok, I can't totally say that nothing happened but I'm not totally sure it was the grape's fault because it might have been just the normal way of things these days. So, after leaving Sprouts I'm driving down toward 407 (headed the back way to Denton) when suddenly..... I HAD TO GO!!! I made a B Line to Target, parked my car, and nearly ran to the restrooms and for a split second I smiled to myself because I realized I was walking much much faster than I had in a long long time.... I'm so grateful to be able to move but that's another story. Anyhow, I survived last night with flying colors.

Reintroducing food into my system today. I started off with my regular lemonade this morning but for the rest of the day I have drink fresh orange juice. The orange juice is supposed to prepare my digestive tract for broth and maybe some veggies tomorrow.

This morning I got on the scale to find that I had lost more weight. When I initially stood on the scale it said 303.3 and I swear I double blinked just to make sure i wasn't seeing things. So, I got off the scale and reweighed myself to find that I wasn't as 303.3 but at 305.6. I'm totally OK with that! The extra weight loss puts me at a total of 14.2 lbs down since Saturday morning.

It's been motivating to see the scale moving again. I had almost forgotten how good it feels.

Well, thanks for thinking of me and thanks for stopping by. I'll be sure to post a picture that my sister took of me a few days ago. She laughs so hard every time she takes a peek of it on her digital camera. I haven't seen it yet but she's made me promise I'd post and blog about it.... it can't be good if she's laughing that hard.

Master Cleanse IV

Yesterday (after work) was my most "off" day thus far. I was sick per se but I did feel exhausted. Around 5pm I needed to sleep. My body was starting to shut down so I left the office a few minutes early and headed straight home. After feeding my dog and doing a few other household chores I went straight to bed. The need for rest was completely undeniable.

I thankfully woke up in time for small group. Along with waking up I found that I was hungry. Really hungry. I thought the hunger was supposed to pass after the 2nd or 3rd day....

Anyhow, as of this morning I've lost 11.8lbs. which puts me at an even 308 lbs. It's motivating to finally see the scale moving but then again that much weight loss in such a short amount of time also scares me.

I also decided that during this detox that I was going to abstain from taking all current medication (which includes vitamins/supplements and birth control). That was a bad idea because my menstrual cycle has kicked into high gear again and it's only been a week since my last. As to be expected it's become more difficult to go through the cleanse while experiencing such a loss.

Today will be my official last day on the cleanse and tomorrow I begin to reintroduce "food" into my system. Actually, I don't get to chew real food until Friday... Let me just tell you that once you're in this.... you're totally in this and there's no going back!

I've heard way too many horror stories from people that haven't followed the directions to properly come off the cleanse, And, those stories have scared the mess out of me so cheating is a non-option at this point even when I'm tempted to sink my teeth into something yummy.

Master Cleanse III

9.2lbs! As of Saturday morning I've lost a total of 9.2 lbs! How crazy is that?! I haven't had a single bite to eat since Friday night and I can't believe I'm still alive!

I told myself my goal was going to be 3 days. I'm hungry and I'm craving me some Avocado Tacos from the GreenHouse. I'll just have another batch of the lemonade and that'll keep me going for atleast a few more hours.

Totally happy to report that I haven't (yet) experienced any head aches or weakness. Life just seems to be going along quite nicely. It's amazing how much more time I have available to me when I'm not obessing over food. I did so much during my lunch break it was sick! Went to the candy store for come chocolate covered cherries (not for me), went to the post office to mail off a care package, went home to let the boys out, finished carving a pumpkin, headed to Drug Emporium for more maple syrup and other goodies and now i'm back at the office. I feel so ....accomplished.

To workout or not to workout?? That's the question. I'm afraid to risk it and I'm just being lazy. Maybe I'll go for a walk after small group tonight.

Master Cleanse II

I more than survived day one of the Master Cleanse and i'm rounding off day two. Yesterday I decided to sleep in a little longer than usual and I got out of bed at 9am and started my day with the sea salt internal wash (which still tastes nasty nasty NASTY!!!). I totally forgot to weigh myself before beginning my day so when I stepped on the scale (after drinking 32 0z) I came in at 319.8lbs.

The lemonade (10 oz of purified water, 2 tbs of grade B maple syrup, 1/10 tsp of cayenne pepper and 1/2 orangic fresh lemon) is pretty tasty!! I really enjoy it and I think I'll most likely drink it on a regular basis even after the fast is finished. I had about 6-7 servings of the lemonade throughout the day yesterday and thank God I didn't eat anything!!

It's about 5:36 right now and I'm still on the cleanse. It's hard for my head to wrap around the idea that I haven't needed to eat yet. I have mild cravings but I don't feel like I'm desperate for food. Anytime i feel hungry I just make myself another serving of the lemonade and it fixes the urge to eat. The only things I'm seriously craving right now are roasted red bell pepper hummus and a loaf of french baguette.

My goal is to make it past tomorrow. if I can go longer then I'll push myself to complete the full 10 days.

A fun little fun fact: i weighed in today around 3pm and found that I'd lost 7.4 lbs since Saturday at morning!! Crazy, huh?!

Although, it's nice to to start dropping water weight I'm mostly looking forward to cleaning out my body of all the sugar and carbs I crave as well as all the hardended junk in my organs.

I may not be able to stomach another round of the sea salt wash so tomorrow I seriously may just skip that part and just do another round of laxative tea first thing in the morning. We'll see...

Master Cleanse I

I started to write a post earlier this week about starting weight watchers today and thankfully i didn't have time to actually post it. Instead, I decided to follow my Dr's orders.... I'm on the Master Cleanse as of this morning.

If you've never heard of it - do yourself a favor and research it!

I'm staying in doors today - for the most part. Currently watching When Harry Met Sally and .......................... I just had to drink 32 oz of luke warm sea salted water. I must've gagged like 40 times.

Now I wait for the bomb to drop.

I'll keep you posted.